Posts

The Void

 In the essence of everything, people try to live as though they try to complete something that is already been created to be a void. As the people try to rush on things in regards to christmas, i noticed how people kept talking with each other. They find comfort in some words from friends, family, or even some random people. They try to fill this gap of emptiness. The void that tends to absorb their whole being, their entirety of who they are. They just kept on looking, looking at something that they might possess or perhaps, some things that they will never be. As they try to find it, they stumble and fall and find another thing after another. Collecting and collecting and collecting just to fill that void. That big hole they try to cover. That hole that is always present yet intentionally not to be seen. That hole that may define the entirety of the reason on why they exist. That whole that always point to something that they will not eventually fill.  As they gaze to some ...

Death

"Death is inevitable". A phrase that always pops up in my mind. A line that always scares me yet gives me wisdom to always view life as it is. I wonder how this phrase really creeps the hell out of me. As if all my achievements, successes, valor, or even those tiny wonders that I did great were just been silenced.  I also wonder how the phrase itself gives the resounding lesson of "you only live once" to me. It emphasizes how I should live my life in the best possible way. Exploring and destroying the fear and anxiousness inside to try something different and enjoy the moments of adventure. Perhaps, this gives me a notion that life is a mystery box that needs courage and perseverance to be opened and expect something that might scare, surprise, or even hurt me. It is like wandering through time and space and expecting something that might be expected or maybe the other way around. Death. A hurtful end of life or a happy beginning of the hereafter. A sad ending full ...

Passion Depletion

 Feeling lonely and having a sense of passion depletion is difficult. You tend to be so fine with your current state, yet you live a life of complete darkness and emptiness. Some days you are at your best, but most days you just lost all the passion that you intend to have. And right now, I am totally living in a blurred line. Moreover, I just need to do something I do not want to because that is what I need to do and not what I chose. I have been experiencing this turmoil since last year. I do not know what my future holds or even what my future will be. I always wanted to become a registered somebody yet, fate never planned something like that for me. Instead, I am now on a different path. Truly speaking, the path gives me a wonderful expression that more opportunities will come my way but as I go on day by day, I just complacently do what I need to do and not what I choose to do. I just really missed my undergraduate studies, those years are amazing because I have some inner rea...

Overthinking Overthinks

 I am emotionally draining and feel like dying. I am tired! Tired of overthinking again and again. I feel like a failure. A defeat! A Victoriously failure being. Perhaps overthinking just made its way. I am tired! I do not know and no words can ever compare my sadness now. I am intoxicated with despair and sorrow! I am tired!  I want to sleep! I want to climb and never return! I desire to escape! I desire to give this life to someone who is well deserving! I just want to go home! To that quiet place of peace and love. - The Overthink thinks of Overthink

Words: Writing

"Words are powerful weapons to express. It may bring joy or despair."       In the midst of uncertainty and displeasure, I found myself so intrigued by the fact that I am still hurting and trying to heal myself from the bruises of the past. Those hurt are still creeping in and trying to devour the entirety of me. Fighting and trying to fit in this calling or vocation as they say. Words are difficult to express the pain and guilt I have at the same time. I am tired and trying to be alright. I know that in this fight, either of the two is expressed, win or lose.       As I ponder around and see the beauty of my surroundings, I can still feel that I am living. I am still breathing and have been awakened by the fact that maybe there are reasons in this world. Those reasons might be essential and even of something worth of risks. Maybe overthinking hits hard against me always pondering about those things that are of different views.     ...

Memories

       Memories takes turn about being good or bad. Sometimes, they seemingly open way for doors in healing or hurting. They emphasized the sense of hope and despair. They looked on the bright or dark side of the individual's views and perceptions.       Memories can be overwhelmingly wonderful but destructive. They point out our strengths yet regrets our decisions. They empowered us but also, deny the capabilities we may certainly achieve if and only if we never gave up. Memories are products of our experiences and the recent nows of our pasts.       Now, what do you think of memories by the way?

I do not Understand

  Let me start these words with a question in my mind. A question that people may tend to overlook but does matter. I do not know if you are with me on this but, it sometimes crept into the most fundamental question of my inner being. Perhaps, overthinking may connote an unhealthy form of the imagination but often, it displaces a particular person from the world of an idea into the hold of reality. My question is, "Am I a toxic person?". A notion that destroys the totality of my being but rebuilds the confidence within me. I do not understand.  Why some people put a barrier when somebody only desires a strong connection for them? Isn't that ironic? Others are praying to have a relationship like that but, some are only taking it for granted. As I meditated on its essence, I have found out that the answer lies not on the person giving but, on the person receiving it. The real query must be to the person receiving it. It might be of the experiences or maybe on the recent for...